No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
She's the barista slut.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
