i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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