I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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