I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I skipped work to stalk him.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
