2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Floor bacon is actually really good
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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