she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
