Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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