is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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