i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize