u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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