is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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