my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Randomize
