i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
