their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
