After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
