how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
