I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
