Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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