You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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