New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
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