To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
