how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
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