and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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