Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Randomize
