I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
