The brown eye won't let me do that either.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
