I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
the gays at disneyland are vicious
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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