in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Blood and glitter go together right?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
