5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
