Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
