So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I'm both gender and math confused
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
