do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
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