just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
