He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
