ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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