found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
