I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
