When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
