Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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