How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
