this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
