My nipple is on Facebook.
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
