Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize