thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Randomize