So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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