Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
