I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Randomize
