i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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