Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
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