if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Randomize
